Breathing in, I know my anger is here.

A seed of violence is one of the negative seeds that I've been watered it for so so long.
and my practice is also very weak. It's not good enough to help me recognise it right away when my anger raise.
In forgetfulness, I make a lots of pain in myself and others.
And after that I always feel so bad and lost my energies weeping for that

When I heard the story about human being they kill each other. my violence inside scream. I hear my voice say that how could they be so cruel to the people who didn't do anything wrong . how could they killed like that. why they are so heartless. and my voice said punish them! they deserved pain equally what they made to others!

But I also hear my teacher's voice say to me that it isn't right way to revenge, to kill. You shouldn't fight violence with violence.

Looking closely, I feel sorrow for the killer.
More closely, I feel sorrow for us. for human being for our pain we all share.
More and more closely, I feel sorrow for myself that even I've been taught. but I'm still too much in forgetfulness so the light cannot shine clearly in my heart.
More and more and more closely I feel more sorrow that I'm so little and I can't change the world that so cruel.

but more and more cand more and more closely, I think it's not right to blame on myself or to water the negative seeds. but if I am little then I'll change the world little by little.

You have my promise.
Rest in peace.

Dharma discussion about monastic life

Me: Did you hesitate when you decided to become a nun and what about after that, have you ever think about giving up on this path?

Sis Mai ngihem : I was almost 18 when I decided to become a nun. I remember the morning after I wrote a letter to the monastic, I woke up and think to myself what did I do? I was thinking about life at school, live the rest of my life in the countryside in france. that thought made me crazy. but then the second thought comes up, It's about the reason why I decided to choose this path and it's even stronger than the first thought.

life of a monastic is not different from normal life. there's up and also down.

the second time my hesitation comes up, was three years after when I 'm going to recite to become bhikkuni I have a strong feeling that i want to disrobe, I was thinking about my life if I wasn't a nun. I was thinking about my study, having a boyfriend, have my own apartment and being close to my family. that though also made me think that I do not deserved the Bhikuni status too because I wasn't ready.

I shared my doubt to one of my elder Dharma sister, and she told me the story about the buddha. when Buddha was sitting beneath the Bodhi tree and nearly reach the enlightenment, Mhara came to Buddha and Mhara offer a lots of choices to Buddha. But Buddha he has a very strong and clear direction to be liberated. So Mhara has no power over him and disappear.

After I heard this story, my doubt has gone. I really don't understand why. and I don't really want to understand it much.

and now I'm happy with my monastic life and even more and more I feel that I still have a lots to discover within myself.

Toward peace and Harmony part:0

When I was there sitting next to Thay,
Thay's looking into my eyes and so did I,
Suddenly, I feel like I can deeply understand The words
"Looking with the eyes of Buddha."
The eyes that filled with limitless generousity
so calm
and so light
but also so powerful.

"Dear Thay,I would like to ask a question...."

Maybe,that moment could change my life.

The day to remember

The happiest moment of today,
It is when about 1400 people in the hall "sitting meditation" together with the monastic even it's only five mins. I feel the strong power of meditation.I feel the voice of us calling for peace. After the whole day that I didn't have time even to have my meal. I just................stop. taking off that walkie talkie and sit down at the back to recognize my breathing. That short moment is worth everything.

What I won't forget,
I saw a lots of smiles obviously showing me their supports.
And a lots of volunteers they never hesitate to do what we ask them to help.
We were tired but also we're happy.

The highlight of today is not only a dharma talk but it's everything every smile everybody even Khunpa Diamond-water that makes us have a story to laugh.

stop for a second to breathe

No matter how busy I am but I always find myself a time to write a journal.
It's one of the way for me to practice, writting in mindfulness in awareness and with love and flower.
Above all, It's what I love to do.

This is the most challanging time for us to practice.
In time of crisis in a rush, practicing is seems to be harder and harder.
Sometimes our temper rising and we lost our practice.
And we fall apart within our violence.
Quietly, Peace is running away from us.

All we needs to do is going back to our breathe.

In
out
deep
slow
calm
ease
smile
release

And one last thing
we can not forget to practice in mindfulness to get over our wrong view of self.

That's the spirit of "Toward peace and Harmony"

In the brightest day when there is no cloud.

Do the shadow still?

In the darkest night when there is no light.

Do the shadow still?

.

Perhaps red is scorching only for the human eyes.
Hot and cold are defined by the human temparature.
Silence is just the name we're giving to what we couldn't hear.
See only our own eyes,
Cry only our own tears,
Speak only our own voice.
This way we can go not so far.

be free where you are

"The mind is a television with thousands of channels
I choose aworld that is tranquil and calm
so that my joy will always be fresh."
....

Thich Nhat Hanh : Present Moment Wonderful Moment

หน้าฝนนี้ขอชวนชาวจิตอาสามาล้างใจให้ใส ล้างห้องน้ำให้สะอาด ถวายเป็นกุศลแก่อาคารที่พักสงฆ์ ณ หออาคันตุกะ พุทธมณฑล

ใครว่าทำบุญต้องใช้เงินอย่างเดียวหรือต้องรอวันสำคัญทางศาสนาเท่านั้น ?
เพราะแรงกายของเราก็สร้างบุญได้เช่นกัน แถมทำได้ทุกวันไม่ต้องเว้นวรรคอีกด้วย ขอเชิญชวนผู้มีจิตอาสา รักความสะอาด อยากออกกำลังกายและใจ ร่วมกันทำบุญด้วยการทำความสะอาด และตระเตรียมที่พักเพื่อรองรับพระภิกษุ-ภิกษุณีจากหมู่บ้านพลัม ประเทศฝรั่งเศส ณ หออาคันตุกะ พุทธมณฑล ในวันพฤหัสและศุกร์ที่ ๑๗ และ ๑๘ พฤษภาคม ๒๕๕๐ เวลา ๘.๐๐ – ๑๖.๐๐ น

........อ่านต่อได้ที่ http://www.oknation.net/blog/mon/2007/05/07/entry-1

ปล.ขอขอบคุณพี่มน เนชั่นมากๆค่ะ ที่ช่วยกันบอกต่อข่าวประชาสัมพันธ์นี้ อย่างรวดเร็วฉับไว้ ทั้งยังใส่ใจรายละเอียด ช่วยเรียบเรียงและแต่งเติมข้อความและภาพให้อีกด้วยค่ะ เหล่าอาสาทั้งหลาย เจอกันค้าบบบบบบบบ

ไม่มีศาสนา

สำหรับข้าพเจ้าแล้วมีเพียงแค่
การเดินทางไปสู่ปัญญา
การเดินทางไปสู้สันติ
เหนือสิ่งอื่นใด
คือการเดินทางไปสู่ธรรมชาติอันเป็นความจริงแท้
พระเยซูมีคำสอน
พระพุทธเจ้ามีคำสอน
ขอทาน โจร ก้อนหิน หนอน ลม หรือแม้แต่ต้นหญ้าก็มีคำสอน
การแสดงความเคารพต่อศาสดา ต่อครูผู้สอนนั้น
ต้องทำด้วยใจอันบริสุทธิ์ และทำด้วยปัญญา
ไม่เช่นนั้นเราเองอาจกลายเป็นผู้ทำลายการดำรงอยู่ของท่านเหล่านั้นไปจน
หมดสิ้นโดยที่เราเองไม่อาจรู้เท่าทัน
ศาสดาก็เป็นแค่สิ่งๆหนึ่งไม่มีความหมายอะไรเลย เป็นเพียงสิ่งที่เคยมีชีวิต
หากไม่มีพวกเราผู้น้อมนำคำสอนของท่านมาปฏิบัติเพื่อก่อให้เกิดความสว่างในจิตใจ
เห็นหรือไม่ว่าเราเป็นผู้สืบทอดชีวิตของศาสดา และศาสนา
จะงดงาม หรือบูดเบี้ยวอย่างไร ก็อยู่ที่พวกเรา
ขอให้วาจาแห่งปัญญาของท่านเหล่านั้นนำทางเราไปด้วยเถิด

The real robbers

There is nothing to fear, because we don't have anything to lose.
All that can be robbed from you is not worthwhile, so why fear, why suspect, why doubt?

These are the real robbers : doubt, suspicion, fear. They destroy your very possibility of celebration. So while on earth, celebrate the earth. While this moment lasts, enjoy it to the very core. Because of fear we miss many things. Because of fear we cannot love, or even we love it is always half-hearted, it is always so-so. It is always up to a certain extent and not beyond which we are afraid, so we get stuck there. We cannot move deeply in friendship because of fear. We cannot pray deeply because of fear.

Be concious but never be cautious. The distinction is very subtle. Consciousness is not rooted in fear. Caution is rooted in fear. One is cautious so that one might never go wrong, but then one cannot go very far. The very fear will not allow you to investigate new lifestyles, new channels for your energy, new directions, new lands. You will always tread the same path again and again, shuttling backward and forward --- like a freight train!

from : Everyday : Osho
and much much thanks for p'koh who lending me this book.

VERY AMSTERDAM

No word is needed.